Hey y’all! Thank you for your continued support as we pursue our second adoption. As of this past week, we are an “active waiting family” which means that we can start receiving cases of expectant moms. Once we receive a case, we have the option to choose to present our profile book (pictures and details that portray our life) to the expectant mother. If we present to an expectant mother and she chooses us, then we are considered “matched.” There is no timeline really on when we will match…it could be tomorrow, a few months down the road, etc. We would appreciate your prayers as we prayerfully discern to say yes or no as cases come to our email. This is where we really get to practice patience, perseverance, and overall trust in the plan that God has for our family. It gives me consolation that He already knows when our family will grow and what it will look like but your prayers are definitely welcomed as we wait.
In the meantime, we are very excited to share Part 2 of our “Choosing Adoption” series and highlight another 3 amazing families! Here is Part 1 if you haven’t had a chance to read it yet.
The McDougal family!
“My husband Ryan and I first talked about adoption on our first date over cheap Chinese food. For us the seeds were planted in our hearts early - we both saw the desperate need through overseas missions and knew it was something we eventually wanted to do. We both wanted a big family. I had dreams of tiny toddlers running around the backyard and a full dinner table every night. Biological, adoptive…I didn’t really care how we got there I just knew it was a desire of my heart. It wasn’t until an expected miscarriage that we knew we were ready to start a family and the adoption snowball started rolling. We decided we would try again for a healthy pregnancy and then eventually adopt someday in the future for our last child. But as month after month passed with miscarriage complications and negative tests we kept feeling adoption pulling at our heartstrings.
The Lord works in funny ways…it started with small glimpses of what he was calling us to do: an adopted neighbor moving in next door, a spoken verse at church, even a movie plot on the TV. I tried to push the signs away and focus on my own plan (never a good idea) but day after day the feelings grew stronger and I finally mentioned it to Ryan. He was of course feeling the same way and we decided to “just look into” the adoption route to weigh our options. I began my research googling everything I could about adoption, following social media accounts, and scheduling coffee with any adoptive mom I knew. There was one coffee date in particular that sticks out to me and as we sat across from each other she poured her heart out to me over our lattes and I felt a clear word placed on my own heart: birth mother. That evening we scheduled a call with a team who would eventually become our adoption consultants and afterward felt absolutely certain that domestic private adoption was what we were called to do. Not only did we want to open our hearts to a new baby but also to show a birth mother unconditional love throughout their life.
Long story short, we met our baby boy Henry just four months later and felt a love like we had never known. Not only for him, but for his birth mother who sacrificed so much to give him the best life that she could. In the middle of the adoption process we found out we were pregnant (surprise!) so we gave birth to a beautiful baby girl just 4 months after meeting Henry. Fast forward a year. I was wrangling my two little one year olds when I got the call: Henry’s birth mother was pregnant again and she wanted use to adopt. And as if life wasn’t crazy enough, we said yes to three babies under two years old. They are my three greatest miracles that I close my eyes and thank God for every single day.
There is so much more to the story…heartbreak, a failed adoption, the Lord’s provision, but what I want you to know is this: if you’re constantly wondering if God is calling you to do something then that is Him calling you to do it. Lean into it and say yes, because I know from first hand experience His plan for your life is better than one you can imagine.” -Alex McDougal
The Teixeira Family!
“Both of us were drawn to adoption before dating, let alone getting married. So when the time came to really discern it as a path to grow our family, it felt very natural for us and was an easy yes. In all our research and preparation, we expected a long and difficult journey…but God had other plans. Three times in four years, God paved the way for three baby girls to come into our family. Not once did we have a completed home study or have the finances prepared. But by God’s grace we got ready…and faster each time! LOL What we didn’t expect was the rewarding yet also tumultuous relationships with our daughters’ birth families. Every one of those relationships is different. Each requires different boundaries than another. But they’re important to fight for, even if they’re hard. I never knew how much those relationships would keep me up at night. But I love my daughters and I love those who gave them life. Adoption isn’t a path for the faint of heart…it’s starts in loss and pain for everyone involved but with God’s grace can be transformed into redemption and beauty.”
-Amanda Teixeira
Hilary and Tim Draftz!
“I personally had limited experience with foster care, but my husband’s family fostered teen moms when he was younger. They would help the young mothers learn how to take care of their babies. We both wanted to have a big family and when it was clear that infertility was a part of our story, we began opening ourselves up to the idea of growing our family through foster care. At work one day, I opened up a Catholic Charities email and it read, “learn how to make a difference in a kid’s life.” In that moment, I realized that we had the ability to make a difference in the prolife movement. We understood that the main goal for foster care is reunification, feeling we were emotionally ready if that were to happen. We never felt drawn towards newborn adoption like others around us did. One evening I was watching a news story about a sibling group that was adopted and I started tearing up. In that moment, I felt a huge tug on my heart towards that. We went through the foster care training in January 2013 with Catholic Charities but were under the impression beforehand that we both could work full time and foster. We decided it wasn’t the best time for us and put fostering on hold.
Fast forward to New Year’s 2019 when we felt the call to take action. Tim had become self-employed and we had much more flexibility. We knew that working through trauma would be involved once we received a placement. Naturally, we had many fears. However, we knew that if God was calling us to this, and He would provide the grace for it. We tried to find any practical resources on parenting kids who came from hard backgrounds and did a lot of trainings to try and prepare as best we could. March 2019 we were blessed to move into a bigger house. During our house hunt our main prayer was, “Jesus give us as big of a house we need for as many kids you want us to take in.” We found an amazing 5-bedroom house which was more bedrooms than we were expecting to have. Shortly after moving in, we worked to become licensed to foster and officially were approved in August 2019. Once active, we looked on the adoption website and saw a group of 6 siblings needing a home. We reached out to our agency and said that we were open to 6 children since God had given us the resources.
We thankfully had a great case worker, and after months of conversation, the oldest sibling of the 6 was placed with us. We got the call on March 18 to pick her up. This was a God moment for us because we had been praying to St. Joseph, foster father of Jesus, throughout the entire process. March 18 is the solemnity of St. Joseph and the day we became foster parents officially. The pandemic allowed us to bond with the oldest sibling and to get used to living together. The rest of the siblings moved in during May. I took 9 weeks off of work to adapt and bond as much as I could. One of the siblings had a hard time adjusting and asked our case worker to be moved. Around the 6 month mark, they left to join another foster home. It was heartbreaking. We wanted to keep all 6 together, but ultimately it was their decision. We still have visits all together and they will always be siblings. After they moved out, it took a few months to reestablish as a family. On May 20, 2021, we became a forever family and finalized the adoption! We are blown away by God's generosity! We've reflected a lot on God's choice to adopt us into His family through our Baptism, and it is so special for us to give to others what He had given to us. Our kids have come a long way in their journey, most beautifully in their own Baptism this past spring. They are a gift, and we know God is showing us His love through them each day.”
-Hilary Draftz